Cosmic Scoundrels


Created by Matt Chapman and Andy Suriano.

A pair of space-bachelors warp from farce to fiasco in Cosmic Scoundrels, by Emmy award winning animator Andy Suriano and the creator of Homestar Runner, Matt Chapman. Comics Alliance called this wild space comedy, “the lurid, hot pink VHS action space comedy that I’ve always wanted in my life.”

Roshambo is a dishonorably discharged soldier and an ex-con. He is a “space pirate” and has a powerful weapon, a “galactic gauntlet,” with undefined (but significant) powers. His partner, Love Savage, is a Prince, a former gigolo, a war criminal, and a fugitive. He is a cross between a futuristic rock star and a glam-rocker. Together they are the Cosmic Scoundrels! Which sounds great but really would be nothing without their motherly A.I. Mrs. Billingsworth. She is the onboard operating system of the duo’s starship/home, the S.S. Fistpuncher. As our hapless duo blunders from job to job, trying to make a buck, Mrs. Bilingsworth helps them stay one step ahead of the law, bill collectors, and anyone else chasing them.

Disguised as space janitors, the Cosmic Scoundrels prepare to steal a cargo container guarded by a formidable dinosaur duo, called the Dimetrotron Brothers. When their cover is blown, biting quips and pink lasers fly as the incorrigible scalawags are forced to improvise their way to success and luck their way into escaping the cargo vessel, the stolen crate in tow.

But when the pair open the crate to check out their look they realize that they have actually stolen a baby! Love Savage takes an instant shine to the little fellow, imagining him as a new sidekick with improbable combat prowess. But Roshambo is having none of this fantasy and insists they sell the child to a fleshdealer.

They warp over to the Fence, a hub of no-good illegal dealings that sits just outside the rule of law. Narrowly escaping the space-cops, they meet with their buyer, a spider-like alien named Hairbath. All goes smoothly, but when Roshambo sees quite how creepy Hairbath is being about the kid he has a change of heart. He rescues the baby by slicing him out of the creep’s clutches and they hightail it back to the Fistpuncher.

Just as the Cosmic Scoundrels are about to make it to safety, they are surrounded by the stained glass spaceships of the Virtuous Sisterhood. The zealous order of space nuns are after the baby, claiming he is theirs and possesses immense power a couple of outlaws could not possibly comprehend. They blast the Fistpuncher with a prayer beam that psychically connects the nuns to the criminals. Love Savage makes the beam backfire, so his impure thoughts and weird pornography overwhelm the Virtuous Sisters, who flee back to their convent planet to confess their sins.

Before this dynamic cosmic duo can catch their breath, a shipful of intergalactic death gods appears and they aren’t happy that Roshambo stole their Galactic Gauntlets. Surely now that they are back on the Fistpuncher, Mrs. Billingsworth will make everything better… and normally she would except she’s just discovered that they’ve been impersonating her real pilots for over a decade. If their usual dumb luck doesn’t save them, maybe the baby will?

Cosmic Scoundrels is Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure meets 3 Men and a Baby in a neon-soaked space buddy comedy homage to ’80s excess.